Silver Treat

I awoke to the sound of cawing crows. It was early, the sun was still below the horizon, and a light fog was visible hanging low over the water. Beauty, came to mind. Ever since we had arrived at Devil's lake I had been reminiscing of the time I had spent in Colorado this summer.  What I viewed of course was on a smaller scale, but still breathtaking. The night before myself and a few other's from our group decided to break away from the camp fire chatter and hike up to the top of a ridge that  over looked Devil's lake.  The hike consisted of following a trail through the woods to the base of the hill and then walking up a stone moonlit stairway. Nearing the top we found and decided on a flat open spot that protruded out from the main path.  We settled, unrolled our sleeping bags and retired to a night of star gazing.  Everything was still, not even a breeze stirred. The moon was high and cast a milk sheen that covered most of the stars, which made for only the brightest planets to be visible.  

This moment that I was experiencing on my third year retreat was in quite a contrast to the events prior. Most of the day could be described as an "information download". The RMC Staff poured out new ideas and changes that were going to be implemented in the coming school year. My perspective on this is, "I'm going to live the change and remember the experience", no matter what may happen this year in terms of what I could find myself doing, I believe my experience and memory will always out weight the current struggle. 

The retreat in all was a success. The Lord showed up in the big and the small and I left feeling confident when it comes to my roles and responsibilities this school year.  I had ample time to rest and enjoy the simple things. Whether it be sitting around a fire chatting, taking a walk through the woods or laying in my sleeping bag starring out over a silver shimmering lake. 

Finding Rest in the Present

Lately I've been thinking a lot about my future. School's just a few days away and I'm experiencing a common phenomenon known as, “the butterflies”. Even with thoughts of my future come memories of my past. I reminisce about the difficult times at school which, also instills anxiety. With my thoughts weighing heavy, tonight I decided to sit down at the dining room table and flip through an old journal that had been an outlet for my many thoughts over the past two years. The date read January 22nd 2008 and the verse for that day read: For the LORD God is a sun and shield: the LORD will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly. Psalm 84:11 “How appropriate a verse for my current state of mind,” I thought. My entry entitled “Present” was also fitting.

Jan-22-08

The present really is a gift, it's in real time. No delay, yet we are subject to our own reaction time. If slow, we can miss the point, lesson, or what God had been trying to whisper. The present, can mean difficulty, yet when looking back, mean victory. One will never experience this victory unless aware of the present. It has a way of sneaking by though; a loss of memory, lack of attention or an incoherent conscience. How precious is the present. Don't miss what you can't keep. 

After reading through, and internalizing I began to notice my once raging case of the butterflies had begun to subside. My focus began to realign, and all my cares and concerns were put to rest. I had found glory in simplicity. A simple concept of Grace and a shield that can protect. You see, God is my shield, and he me gives grace to sustain. 

I think many us today are barren of peace, and our concept of rest lies in a Tempur-Pedic mattress commercial. We are caught up in our past experiences and future concerns and if not on the brink; a future of burnout. This is something I personally would like to avoid. I loth the day when I feel trapped by my past, looking at a grim future. We all face cross-roads in our lives, we are given a choice and must except the consequences thereof. I choose now to live in the present, to give worry, anxiety and even circumstance to God. We all face cross-roads. When do you decide enough is enough? The present really is a beautiful thing. May we choose live in it and find the rest that resides in protection and Grace.